The Sadness of Memory Loss

“The people we most love do become a physical part of us, ingrained in our synapses, in the pathways where memories are created.”
― Meghan O'Rourke, The Long Goodbye

Our memory is an amazing thing, and yet can also be very fragile. In our early years we take it for granted thinking that we will always have it; naive or ignorant about how untrue this is.

From the time we are infants our brain begins to store memories of our life events; good, bad, happy, sad, and so much more. As we travel on our path of life we recall these memories to comfort us, to make us laugh, and to hold on to the good times. They are a big part of who we are and how we live our life.

When we, or a loved one starts to lose the ability to recall these memories, or even something that happened a few short hours ago, we may initially attribute it to getting older. As it starts to become a bigger issue we may try to ignore or hide it rather than acknowledge there is a problem. Family members or friends may take notice, but are afraid to address it as they don’t want to upset the one effected.

The loss of memory can instill great fear as someone tries to maneuver through daily life. There is the fear that others will notice as they forget names or simple words, or how to do a normal daily task. Fear of forgetting where they are going and how to get there, or how to get back home. Many times in the effort to hide the slow transgression they don’t address an issue that might be remedied with the proper diagnosis. It’s human nature to assume the worst.

There are many reasons for loss of memory, and it isn’t always dementia or Alzheimer’s. There are other factors that can play a role, and any memory loss should be checked to determine what the root cause is. There are ways to treat many of these and restore memory function.

• Silent Stroke
• Nutritional Deficiency
• Sleep Apnea
• Stress or Depression
• Head Injury
• Infection
• Medications

In cases where the memory loss is irreversible due to disease, and time will only deepen the loss, we are left with a deep void. The heartbreak for a loved one who is no longer remembered by a spouse (or family member) can be devastating. Not being able to share memories of falling in love, marriage and the years of anniversaries, the birth of children, and so much more wears on the heart of the one who does remember it all. The one experiencing the memory loss feels fear and sadness at first, but in time they are no longer aware of what has happened. The ones left with the memories find them both a blessing and a curse.

Unfortunately, memory loss will bring great sadness to many of us at some point in life. Until that day arrives we need to keep our mind active and engaged for as long as possible, and cherish every moment; all the while praying that we don't have to endure the heartbreak of a long slow good-bye.