Working Moms and Stay-at-Home Moms
Whether we want to admit it or not, there is a conflict (usually unspoken) between working moms and stay-at-home moms. An underlying resentment for what each perceives the other's life is like. As with many things in life it is human nature to believe the grass is always greener on the other side.
Working mothers not only have to get the kids up and ready to go out the door, but need to make sure they are ready and make it to work on time. God forbid one of the children is sick, because you then need to have someone that will take them for the day or you miss work. Not something that goes over well with employers or co-workers. After work you pick up the kids and rush home to cook dinner, make sure homework is done, and that they are bathed and in bed at a reasonable time so they have enough rest. Once they are sleeping you put the house in order and prepare lunches for the next day. In the midst of all of this chaos there is the unbearable guilt you feel for not being home with them every day. Although some mothers have the option of choosing to work, most have no choice financially. And there lies the thing that brings on resentment for the stay-at-home mom. Working moms feel the stay-at-home mom is privileged to be able to have that choice.
The mothers that stay at home with their children may do so because they can afford to financially, or they make sacrifices to live on one income to be home with their kids. Of course that one income needs to be at a certain level or no amount of sacrifice will work. They are fortunate in many ways to provide the care for their children instead of having a child care provider do so. Nobody else cares for your children the way you do. Of course staying at home every day can be isolating. Being home with young children can be exhausting and at times feel like a thankless job. The routine is the same most days and at times extremely chaotic. And while they are home, many mothers they know are out in the world having adult conversations. Although they may have a college degree, each year that they are home, they are losing touch with advances happening at lightening speed. If and when they choose to re-enter the work force they may find it difficult to find a good job. So they have their own resentment for working moms who they may perceive as having it all.
I was a working mom and had times when I was envious of the moms who were able to stay home. Perhaps some of them envied me for being a part of the working world. Truth is we both were right in some ways and wrong in many others.
As mothers we truly need to support each other. Whether we are the ones at home or the ones out in the working world, we need one another so all mothers will succeed. If we do then we, and our children, win.
Working mothers not only have to get the kids up and ready to go out the door, but need to make sure they are ready and make it to work on time. God forbid one of the children is sick, because you then need to have someone that will take them for the day or you miss work. Not something that goes over well with employers or co-workers. After work you pick up the kids and rush home to cook dinner, make sure homework is done, and that they are bathed and in bed at a reasonable time so they have enough rest. Once they are sleeping you put the house in order and prepare lunches for the next day. In the midst of all of this chaos there is the unbearable guilt you feel for not being home with them every day. Although some mothers have the option of choosing to work, most have no choice financially. And there lies the thing that brings on resentment for the stay-at-home mom. Working moms feel the stay-at-home mom is privileged to be able to have that choice.
The mothers that stay at home with their children may do so because they can afford to financially, or they make sacrifices to live on one income to be home with their kids. Of course that one income needs to be at a certain level or no amount of sacrifice will work. They are fortunate in many ways to provide the care for their children instead of having a child care provider do so. Nobody else cares for your children the way you do. Of course staying at home every day can be isolating. Being home with young children can be exhausting and at times feel like a thankless job. The routine is the same most days and at times extremely chaotic. And while they are home, many mothers they know are out in the world having adult conversations. Although they may have a college degree, each year that they are home, they are losing touch with advances happening at lightening speed. If and when they choose to re-enter the work force they may find it difficult to find a good job. So they have their own resentment for working moms who they may perceive as having it all.
I was a working mom and had times when I was envious of the moms who were able to stay home. Perhaps some of them envied me for being a part of the working world. Truth is we both were right in some ways and wrong in many others.
As mothers we truly need to support each other. Whether we are the ones at home or the ones out in the working world, we need one another so all mothers will succeed. If we do then we, and our children, win.
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