Happy Father's Day

Father's Day is a holiday to honor fatherhood and paternal bonds, as well as the influence of fathers in society. In the United States, Father's Day was founded by Sonora Smart Dodd, and celebrated on the third Sunday of June for the first time in 1910. The day is held on various dates across the world and different regions maintain their own traditions of honoring fatherhood.

Fathers play a significant role in their children's lives, and at times do not realize how much influence they have in shaping who their children grow up to be. On this Father's day, I would like to share once again a blog I wrote a few years back about my own father, and also wish every father a very happy Father's Day.

My Father's Absence

Although it's been twenty-plus years since my father's passing, I still miss him. There are some days when I feel his absence more than others; with the arrival of Father's Day there have been many of these days.

My father was not a perfect man; like everyone he had his flaws. However, he was a good man. He was very intelligent and had a sharp wit and good sense of humor. He also had a good heart and treated people fairly, regardless of social status or race.

He was strict when it came to his daughters, but what father wouldn't be? Even though I rebelled as a teenager, I came to understand his reasons when I became a parent. He was only trying to protect us from the bad in the world.

I remember him bringing candy bars home in his lunch pail for us and taking us for a ride on Sundays. Sometimes in the summer, we would go to the lake for a cookout, or pile in the car to see a movie at the drive-in theater. He also taught us fun things like reciting the alphabet backwards as he was taught as a child.

My father worked hard to support our family, and all his children inherited his work ethic. We learned that if you wanted anything in life you had to work for it; nothing would just be handed to you.

He had some old sayings that I attribute to his Vermont upbringing - some I found very amusing:

• Don't tell tales out of school. (don't gossip)
• Don't count your chickens before they are hatched. (nothing is certain until it has happened)
• If you put your problems in a pile with everyone else's you would take your own back. (your problems don't seem so bad compared to what others deal with)
• If you want something done right, then do it yourself. (nobody will do things the way you do)
• Number than a pounded thumb. (someone not too bright)
• You wouldn't want your children sitting in the corner picking their nose. (if he heard someone say their children were too active - he believed a smart child was a busy child)
• His (or her) mouth is running like a whippoorwill's a_ _. (they talk too much)
• That's like the pot calling the kettle black. (criticizing another for something you have done)
• I'm sure there are many more I don't recall right now, but I still find myself using them today.

As my father aged, he became very hard of hearing; too many years working around heavy equipment as a master mechanic. His phone calls were very difficult as he refused to wear a hearing aid, and he couldn't understand much of what I said. After repeating myself many times, I would finally do more listening than talking. I'm sure he was happy that I would listen to his old stories.

So, with Father's Day here, I am feeling his absence and missing him more than usual. As difficult as those phone conversations were, I would give anything to receive one and listen as he shared an old story once more.