Observations on Relationships
We are often reminded today how a large percentage of marriages end in divorce, or long term relationships dissolve. As anyone knows the wild passionate love in the beginning does not last forever. When it starts to fade, rather than working to make the next phase deeper and more meaningful, many people give up. No effort - no reward.
However, there is something more pervasive that is responsible for sabotaging relationships to the point of destruction. All you need to do is sit back and observe couples when they are out in public. The sad part of it all is that they are allowing it to happen.
I am referring to cell phones and social media sites. People are so glued to their phones and engrossed in either telling everyone what they are doing, or wondering what everyone else is doing, that they are ignoring the person they are with. How could you possibly feel that what is happening in your own life at that moment is not more important.
We were recently in a restaurant and a young couple came in with their children. After they were seated, they never spoke a word to one another as the woman was on her cell phone checking social media updates. They were seated for quite some time before they received their food, and she never put her phone down during that time. She did finally put it aside to eat. As I observed this I kept thinking how insignificant her partner must have felt. How long does she think he will tolerate this before he looks for attention from someone else? Will she be shocked if he does?
Relationships are not always easy. They require a lot of time and effort if they are to be successful. If you attention is constantly occupied by phones and social media then I don't know how you would ever have a meaningful relationship with someone. How can you know the person you are with, if you are not really "with" them? When I overhear young people talk about their partner never paying attention to them, I think they need to ask themselves this question: "when they were paying attention early on, did they stop because I was ignoring them?"
If you want to have a successful relationship then you need to think long and hard about whether you are doing all you can to make it happen. If you continue to believe you can't live without your phone and social media fix, then you better get used to being alone. If you don't look at each other and communicate you will never truly know one another. The deeper you know somebody, the more successful your relationship will be.
There is truth when it comes to relationships, if there is no effort then there is no reward.
However, there is something more pervasive that is responsible for sabotaging relationships to the point of destruction. All you need to do is sit back and observe couples when they are out in public. The sad part of it all is that they are allowing it to happen.
I am referring to cell phones and social media sites. People are so glued to their phones and engrossed in either telling everyone what they are doing, or wondering what everyone else is doing, that they are ignoring the person they are with. How could you possibly feel that what is happening in your own life at that moment is not more important.
We were recently in a restaurant and a young couple came in with their children. After they were seated, they never spoke a word to one another as the woman was on her cell phone checking social media updates. They were seated for quite some time before they received their food, and she never put her phone down during that time. She did finally put it aside to eat. As I observed this I kept thinking how insignificant her partner must have felt. How long does she think he will tolerate this before he looks for attention from someone else? Will she be shocked if he does?
Relationships are not always easy. They require a lot of time and effort if they are to be successful. If you attention is constantly occupied by phones and social media then I don't know how you would ever have a meaningful relationship with someone. How can you know the person you are with, if you are not really "with" them? When I overhear young people talk about their partner never paying attention to them, I think they need to ask themselves this question: "when they were paying attention early on, did they stop because I was ignoring them?"
If you want to have a successful relationship then you need to think long and hard about whether you are doing all you can to make it happen. If you continue to believe you can't live without your phone and social media fix, then you better get used to being alone. If you don't look at each other and communicate you will never truly know one another. The deeper you know somebody, the more successful your relationship will be.
There is truth when it comes to relationships, if there is no effort then there is no reward.
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